If we all die, this post will seem regrettable.
- Aide:
“Mr President, _EVERYONE ON EARTH HAS THE VIRUS…_ *EVEN YOU!*”
- Mr President:
“Oh shit… is this it? Is this humanity's end? Have I failed?”
- Aide:
“No, sir. Just take these vitamin supplements, a little rest and watch some Adam Sandler movies from bed. You'll be fine again in four days. I can cook you some bacon if you like? For irony?”